And 2 becomes 3...

October 24, 2012

2 becomes 3 (we had been moving into our new home and were a mess and in complete shock!)

3 pregnancy tests later...

How do I begin to write about one of the best days and biggest miracles of my entire life?  I have to warn you this is a LONG post.  I want to remember every detail so... I wrote every detail.  Which is why it has taken me 4 weeks to get it up.  (Also because I'd rather be staring at my baby boy or spending time with my BOYS than sitting on the computer, so it took 4 weeks and I don't care at all.  At least I got it done!)

Well it all began Saturday morning on October 6^th.  Justin and I woke up and began preparing to go to the hospital.  It was General conference weekend so we had that on for a bit that morning.  Pop was also staying with us, and he ran to  Ryan’s football game.  I also tried to clean up as much as I could at the last minute.  I ran the vaccuum and straightened up, I wanted to come home to a spotless house and I wanted it to be perfect for my mother who was coming up at some point to stay with us. 

As ready as we will ever be!!

Justin and I were ready to go by about 11:30 and we asked Pop to give me a blessing with J.  It was beautiful and very calming.  Just what I needed to hear.  Then Pop headed over to Merri’s and we said goodbye.  A few minutes later J and I drove one of our cars over to Merri and we caravanned to Banner Desert for our noon induction.  We got there and Merri started talking to some of her nursing friends while we registered.  After a few minutes (12:30pm) Merri and her friend Kimberlee Stoda (our 1^st nurse) came and got us and they escorted us back to our room, the Princess suite, #23.  This room was special to me because each of my sisters had had a baby in this room.  This is the room I was MOST familiar with because I had been here before with my sisters when they had their babies.  It is also the largest L&D room at the hospital.  It sure helps to have connections at the hospital – THANKS MERRI!!!

one of the focal points I thought I'd use was Baby D's coming home outfit

My Day nurse Kimberlee

As I got in my gown Merri took J to see where the snacks, drinks, and ice were at.  I changed in the bathroom and while they were gone I heard a neighbor screaming and moaning in pain.  I had felt so much excitement and anticipation up to this point, and then the real nerves hit.  Oh my goodness that women sounded like she was dying and it really scared me.  J noticed the noise to and at one point he turned the sound on on the TV to drown it out (but it didn’t help much).  Merri and the nurse Kimberlee didn’t seem to notice, I guess that much time as a L&D nurse you tune it out.  But oh my goodness J and I were freaked out J  The nurse did inform us that she was having her baby naturally.  (I went to the hospital with no plan,  I was going to go with the flow and see what happened, I didn’t know if I would get an epidural or not.  I was hoping I wouldn’t get one, but J really wanted me to and we didn’t know if I would need to get one anyway, in case my septum tore and the Dr. needed to repair it.  I also had never felt a painful contraction so I had no clue what to expect.  However after hearing this women I thought to myself, I don’t want to be miserable through all of my labor, I would prefer to enjoy it and not be yelling.  I also didn't know how long my labor would last and if it was going to be a marathon I would need some rest)

J and I reviewing relaxation techniques from Merri's childbirth class

At 1:15pm Kimberlee checked me and I hadn’t made any progress since my last appointment with Dr. W.  I was still between a 4 and 5cm and a -1 station.  Everything else was looking good.  However I wasn’t even having any contractions.  This was a bit discouraging but I knew soon things would be getting started.   At 1:45pm We received labor orders from Dr. W (Start the IV antibiotics and after 2 hours of the antibiotics we could start the Pitocin.  We wanted to be sure I received both doses of the antibiotics for the group b strep so the baby would be safe and since I was already dialated so far we didn’t want to start the pit too early and have our boy join us too quickly)  We waited around for a little bit watching football and listening to our laboring neighbor and then at 2:30 it was time for the dreaded IV.  I was so nervous for it but Merri warned the nurse and they both took great care of me.  I looked and focused on Justin and they gave me lidocaine to numb the area.  Sadly they hit a valve in my first vein and had to try again.  But the 2^nd time was the charm.  They had me lay back and wet wash cloths etc on me and I did great!  They even wrapped it up for me so I didn’t have to look at it (that helped the most I think!).  Whew I was glad I survived that.  The antibiotics were started at 2:40pm.  The IV antibiotics did burn some and that wasn’t fun but I was so hungry (since I hadn’t eaten any breakfast that morning, I was too nervous and preoccupied) that since we hadn’t started the PIT they allowed me to go to the cafeteria and get some food.  I was so excited.  At 3:30 I ate a delicious turkey burger and French fries with Merri and J.  It tasted so good!  I thoroughly enjoyed my last meal and I didn’t even feel guilty about the French fries since I knew my body was about to burn some serious calories J.  It was really fun to just sit and enjoy lunch with Merri and J. 

That's right, I got to eat!

We headed back to the princess suite and at 5:00pm we started the PIT.  Then every 30 minutes from 5pm to 7:30pm they increased the PIT by 2mil, we started off at 2 mil and increased it to 12 mil by 7:30.  During this time we had fun relaxing and visiting in my room.  Sam and Angie and Jeff and Elsie all came and we just talked and hung out while I went from the rocking chair to the birthing ball to the bed etc.  There was a time where Merri even relaxed on the bed while J and I were in the chairs.  Poor Merri had been woken up early that morning by Rylee and she hadn’t gotten much sleep.

My visitor Elsie! She was a great distraction and lots of fun!

I remember wondering if I would ever feel a painful contraction.  I thought that when they started the PIT after 30 min to an hour I would’ve been at least uncomfortable.  But nope, nothing.  In my head I felt like our little boy would NEVER come.  Mentally I honestly had prepared myself that I may never feel the pain of labor.  My whole life I had prepared myself that I may never be pregnant and during this pregnancy I had prepared myself that I may need a C section.  I just had no idea what to expect as far as labor pain and for some reason I just thought our boy may never join us.  It seemed like an eternity of being in that princess suite before the real action began.  I could feel the tightening of my uterus sometimes, but for the most part we watched the monitor and we got so excited when we started to see the contractions become regular and form a pattern on the monitor.  We even took a picture of the monitor when we could see 4 contractions on the screen, but at this point they still weren’t painful. 

See those mountains in white?  Those were my contractions...woo hoo 3 on the screen at a time!

I was and am SO grateful for my husband, sister, and friends that were there to distract me for the afternoon.  I don’t know what I would’ve done without them all.  I think I would’ve gone crazy waiting around. 

Sammy surprised us and came around 6:30 pm.  She came in all smiles and ready for action!  Angie, Jeff, and Elsie came to visit around 7pm.  They brought dinner for Sam and themselves and it looked so yummy (I believe it was chick-fil-a).  We just visited and enjoyed each others company.  I was so grateful for the distraction; it really helped pass the time.  I’m so lucky to have such great friends. 

At 7:30 they gave me my 2^nd dose of antibiotics and I got a new nurse named Michelle Armstrong.  (Let me just say I loved both of my nurses that had been hand-picked for me by my nurse Merri, but I felt like I didn’t really need them since I had Merri around, she could’ve done it all – and she DID do most of it except for the actual giving of drugs etc, but she really ran the show in my opinion.  Couldn’t have survived without her.  She is the reason I have this terrific timeline all written down too, she is definitely a PRO at this!  THANK YOU dear sister! (I will never be able to adequately thank you for all you did for us!)

At 9:08 they checked me again and at this point I was FINALLY starting to feel quite uncomfortable.  I was getting very mixed feelings of excitement and nerves.  I thought for SURE I had to have made some progress…and NOPE, I was the same but my baby’s head was a little more applied to the cervix, meaning it would be safer for my water to break now.  (If my water was broken before the baby’s head was on my cervix there is a much higher risk for a cord prolapse or the umbilical cord falling out before the baby, which is very dangerous) 

After they checked me at about 9:15 Jeff and Angie left.  They told Sam to keep them updated on everything.  I was so grateful to know they cared so much!  At this point I was feeling very uncomfortable and I started to be more oblivious to what was going on in my room and I started paying attention only to Justin and trying to breathe.  After Ang and Jeff left I was feeling what I would describe as PAIN for the first time and I lost it.  I can’t tell you why and I can’t explain all that I was feeling but I had an emotional breakdown.  I started sobbing and I almost couldn’t catch my breath.  I was so excited and so scared and I had forgotten to breathe and was so embarrassed and I was just feeling so much overwhelming love for Justin.  More than any other emotions, I was just feeling SO much LOVE for Justin I couldn’t even describe it.  I was so thankful to have him by my side for this event that I had waited and dreamed of for my entire life.  I was overcome by tears!  I also knew that the biggest event in my life was about to take place.  Once I finally caught my breath, Merri really helped by reassuring me that I was doing a good job and everything was going perfectly, I was able to relax a little bit.  It was just SO out of the blue I had no idea where all the tears had come from, I was very embarrassed.  I had never heard of other people losing it during their labor! 

After being checked I just remember being very uncomfortable and needing to concentrate on relaxing and breathing.  I could no longer talk through the contractions.  When those first few painful contractions hit me everything I had learned from my sister and her class seemed to fly out the window and all I was thinking about was the pain.  That is until I heard Sam’s voice remind me to breathe because I had been holding my breath (that is just what I do when I am in pain).  She reminded me on those first few painful contractions to BREATH and that is when I tried to focus on every relaxation technique I had learned.  Breathing is HARD to do when you feel like you have a 100 lb weight sitting on your chest and stomach.  And Justin was trying to help me relax my body by touching the parts of me that were tensing up, so he would stroke my forehead and I would know I was tensing it up and I needed to relax it.  Once I would relax that body part I then realized that every other body part I had was tense and I didn’t know how I could ever relax multiple body parts at once.  It just hurt too much.  I was curling my toes and my shoulders were up by my ears and my face was scrunched up and I was squeezing Justin’s hands with all my might, everything was tense.

They reported that I had not dilated more to Dr. Wilson and he told them to break my water.  At 9:45pm Dr. Vaziri broke my water.  I knew that often times after your water is broken things can get intense fast, and since I was already very uncomfortable I wanted the option of getting an epidural after my water broke (I still was silently hoping that I could do it without pain meds).  So at 9:50, only 5 minutes after they broke my water it was definitely INTENSE and I was IN PAIN and I (in as few words as possible since I felt like I couldn’t breathe at all) requested my epidural.  I also got very nauseous and thought I was going to be sick so they quickly gave me Zofran (anti-nausea meds) through my IV.   And did you know that they can’t just give you an epidural as soon as you want one?  They have to do a fluid bolus first, which is they have to quickly get an entire bag of IV fluids into you first which takes about 10-15 min.  YIKES!    During this time where I couldn’t get an epidural I could hardly breathe (I thought they teach you to do breathing exercises to help distract you from the pain and give you something else to focus on. I didn’t know that they ACTUALLY tell you to breathe because physically it is VERY difficult for your body to breathe.  Breathing was so HARD for me to do, I just wanted to hold my breath through it all) At first I tried breathing and hissing as I exhaled, which was a technique from Merri’s birthing class, but I found that I was clenching my teeth and wasting to much energy.   So instead I tried Shhhhshing (another technique Merri taught us) as I exhaled with J leading me in it and that SAVED me.  It kept me breathing and distracted me as much as is humanly possible during labor. 

I don’t remember much that happened during this short period of time except that ALL I WANTED WAS MY JUSTIN.  I had brought an ultrasound picture of our  baby boy and his going home outfit for my focal points and I could’ve cared less about them, mostly because I never opened my eyes.  They were glued shut during all of the pain.  The only thing I NEEDED was my Justin.  I needed to squeeze his hands and I needed to follow his breathing.  He led me through it all.  He was the only thing that existed to me at that moment.  I remember thinking at some point, I have no idea how a single mother could do labor on her own or how a women could have a baby when her solider husband was overseas.  I am SO grateful that my J was able to be there with me I don’t know how I would’ve survived without him. 

The contractions were right on top of each other.  There was only a few seconds between each one before the next one would start again.  I didn’t have time to talk or even open my eyes.  All I was able to do was say, “epidural” or “where is he” hoping that they would understand I meant the anesthesiologist since I couldn’t get any more words out.  I just needed to make sure they KNEW that I wanted and needed that epidural STAT.  In my mind I was thinking that I hadn’t progressed at all when they checked me last and I had NO IDEA how long I would be in labor, I could hardly relax 2 or 3 body parts at a time, my eyes were squeezed shut, and I was squeezing Justin’s hand harder than I thought I could and that was all energy I was quickly wasting that I knew I needed to save for delivery.  I didn’t think I could do hours of this incredible pain and still be able to push my baby out, so I knew I needed that epidural. 

20 minutes after they broke my water, at 10:05 Dr. Murphy (the anesthesiologist) came in and at 10:15 the epidural was placed.  I never saw any part of the dr. (not his face or even his feet)  my eyes were shut tight in pain and I just focused all I had on breathing with my Justin.  I had heard from others that having to curl your body for the epidural is really hard especially during a contraction, and I was so nervous about holding still enough because those contractions tensed up every part of my body.  I remember clearly when the Dr. told me I was in a great position, I was so relieved because there was no way I could’ve curled my body anymore!   I hardly even know how I was able to move my body to sitting up during those contractions.  The pain was so strong and continuous. 

It took a few minutes for me to feel any relief so J and I just kept breathing and shhshing through the never-ending contractions.  But as soon as some of the pain subsided I was SO happy and I was exhausted.  I was SO exhausted that I would describe it as feeling druged.  Like someone gave me 5 sleeping pills.  I can’t remember ever feeling so exhausted!  I felt like I could hardly form a sentence.  After a few minutes, at 10:40pm I felt some pressure and I told Merri and the nurse.  They said that warrants a check.  So they checked me and the nurse said, “I don’t feel anything.”  In my mind I thought she meant nothing had changed or I hadn’t progressed at all and my heart sank.  For a moment I thought we would be there for days and I would need a c section because even with all that pain and them breaking my water nothing had happened.  But come to find out she meant she couldn’t feel the septum and I was at 10 cm and complete.  In 55 minutes I had gone from 4-5 cm to 10.  HALLELUJA!!   That was the best news!  At 10:45 they gave me an epidural rebolus, which is another bag of fluid I believe and then they let me SLEEP!  It was awesome!  I was so tired and they just let me rest!  I have no clue if Justin, Merri, or Sam rested at all, but as for me, I was out.  J

Then at 11:45 Nurse Michelle came in (who was a nurse who helped deliver Katie’s last baby Liam) and we did a practice push to see if it was time to call Dr. Wilson and have him come in.  I was still tired but I was way more excited than I was tired so I was ready!  She said to push (and I had no clue what I was doing there either, especially since I had a great epidural) and right as I started pushing the nurse said, “STOP, Stop, stop!!  We will call Dr. Wilson right now, your baby is ready!”

Ready to push and we are all smiles!  Lets DO THIS!!

I rested for another little while and Dr. Wilson arrived at 12:23am (it seemed like it took him forever to get there) but we just left the lights off and rested.  When he came in Sam said goodbye (she headed to the waiting room) and I was all smiles.  So excited for what was about to happen.  Dr. Wilson got changed and I knew that meant it was time.  They broke down the bed and asked if we wanted a mirror.  I didn’t know if J could handle that but he said yes and I was on board!  I wanted to see if I was making progress etc.  My first push I held my breath and pushed through my face and Dr. Wilson told me not to push in my face.  After that I tried so hard NOT to push through my face and I could actually see my baby’s head coming.  I was staring at J and at the mirror and listening to Merri as she reassured me that I was doing things right and that everything was going perfectly!  I really needed her reassuring words!  I could see Justin’s excitement and I felt so much love for him!  He was my ROCK!  And he never even looked woozy!  At one point we could see the top of our baby’s head and his skin was wrinkled up and the bones were moved a little and it worried Justin.  He didn’t know that was normal.  Haha, I remember wondering about that too, but we could also see his hair and that was very exciting!    It’s absolutely a miracle to see the top of your babies head!  I couldn’t believe it! I was so glad I got to watch it all happen!

After 3 contractions, at 12:34 am, our baby boy slid out so gently and he looked perfect!  He wasn’t covered with the white waxy vernix or anything yucky and he only gave 2 little cries (the best sound I’ve ever heard!!!).  They didn’t have to suction him out or ANYTHING.  He was PERFECT in every single way.  After they laid him on my chest he was calm and I could NOT believe the rush of emotions and LOVE I felt.  I was in HEAVEN!!  The moment I’d dreamed of, prayed for, hoped for, lived for, had come and I was happier than ever!  I could’ve stayed in that moment with Justin forever.

Right after he was born he was already sucking away on his thumb

One of the nurses volunteered rather quickly to take him over to weigh him and do all that stuff, when Dr. Wilson quickly said, “You can hold your baby as long as you’d like too.” So I told that nurse I’d just like to hold my boy.  I had waited my entire life for this moment.  I could care LESS what he weighed or measures, I just want to hold him and have my husband by my side.  I wanted to soak it all up and never let him go unless I was giving him to J to hold.  That moment is tied for the best moment of my entire life, tied with the moment I was sealed to my J.  I’ve never felt so close to Heaven. 

J and I were so happy, I love how J's hand never left my face.
It was so sweet!

Then when J went over to the warmer with Lincoln his hand never left him  either.  LOVE!

We named our son Lincoln John DeTemple.  His middle name is for both of my grandfathers, 2 extraordinary men who I will always admire, love, and respect.  I can’t wait to teach Linc about the men he was named for.  He weighed 7lbs 2 oz and was 20 inches long. 

After a few minutes Sam came in and J took Lincoln over to meet her.  I was still all smiles even though Dr.W was stitching me up.  Sam was able to meet him and hold him for a minute and then she said goodbye.  I’m so glad she got to meet him!!  We love our Sam!

After Lincoln’s delivery they tried to get me up after a while to go to the bathroom.  I made it in their great with Merri and the nurse’s assistance while J stayed with Little Lincoln.  While I was in there I got sick all of a sudden and I couldn’t hear anything and I knew I was going to pass out.  They pressed the emergency button and 2 other nurses ran in.  Oh lovely.  They tried to get me up about 3 more times and each time I’d pass out again, or at least loose all the color in my face and my hearing and I couldn’t see anything.  Eventually they got me into the wheel chair and got me back to my bed.  It was an awful feeling and very scary.  I’m just glad there were people there to help me.  Poor J must’ve been scared to death when the nurses ran in.  But it all worked out ok, thank goodness. 

After a bit more rest they transferred us up to the post-partum floor.  Sweet Merri stayed through the night on no sleep in over lots and lots of hours and she sat in a very uncomfortable chair the entire time.  I’m so glad she stayed by our side, I was nervous for her to leave.  She was a huge help in every way!  After we got to the post-partum floor they took Lincoln to get some tests and things done and we all slept.  It was the deepest sleep I’d ever experienced. 

During our hospital stay Lincoln was perfect.  He had no jaundice at all and he left weighing 6lbs 10 oz.  He was circumcised and Justin went with him for that procedure but wasn’t able to be with him during the actual event.  But it all healed very nicely but it was hard for me to see afterwards. 

Our Nurse Merri - BEST nurse and help ever!  I can't express how grateful we are for her!!!

Little Lincoln is very loved.  We had so many friends and family visit and we didn’t even get to see everyone that wanted to come.  We saw Grandpa and Grandma Thornburg, Grandma and Grandpa DeTemple and Janae, Aunt Merri and Uncle Rich, Ryan, Rylee, and Rhett, Auntie Katie, cousin Kade, Aunt Debbie and Uncle Gavin, Luke and Leah, Angie, Jeff, Corissa, Casie, Sammy, and I’m sure there were more. 

don't mind me, I'm all swollen from all the fluids - but I LOVE this picture of Pop and his  newest grandson.  

Meeting some of his cousins 

An Angie original creation - Lincoln's welcome to the world cake!  SO cute!

We make quite the team!  

beautiful Gma Thornburg

Meeting cousin Kade

Aunt Katie

And 2 became 3

Our friend Corrissa

Snuggle time!

I LOVE Lincoln's profile, isn't he precious!? But I also love seeing how small he is compared to his Daddy's hand.

We stayed in the hospital from Saturday, October 6 – Tuesday, Oct 9.  Justin was VERY ready to leave and get out of the tiny hospital room by this time.  We ended up having to wait all morning and afternoon on Tuesday for the birth certificate people to come see us.  But we finally got out of there!  (Nat rode home in the back seat with Lincoln and J drove slower than I’ve ever seen him drive)

Yawning as he gets into his car seat for the  1st time! 

When we arrived home we were so excited and surprised to see beautiful baby boy decorations all over the front of our house.  It made us feel very loved and special and we will never forget it!  Merri and the kids did it for us!  Like Merri hadn’t done enough for us! (Truth be told I got a little emotional when J took down the décor without asing me – can I blame the hormones please? ;) Then it was just wonderful to be met by Grandma Thornburg at the door!  We were so happy to see her and have her stay with us for the next 2 weeks!  She did SO much for all of us.  She was constantly cleaning or holding Lincoln or babying me by feeding me or bringing me things I needed.  She was another life saver!  (That's another blog post)

We love the decorations!  They made us feel so special!

J bought me beautiful flowers! Even if his mom reminded him too :) 

I know that my pregnancy and labor and deliver went smoothly as an answer to many prayers and because of priesthood blessings.  I am eternally grateful for my baby boy and my amazing best friend/husband.  I know that I am beyond blessed to have experienced pregnancy and delivering my baby and I will thank God daily for this opportunity to be a mother.  My dreams have come true and I couldn’t be more thrilled, humble, and grateful.  I marvel that Justin and I created this LIFE together.  What a miracle.  I’ve dreamed my whole life of this and now my dream has come true and it is just going to keep getting better from here!

Here are some other pictures I wanted to add but didn't have time to put them in the right spot.

I love his hands under his chin! 

coming home outfit

so happy together!

We love our Dr!

Nurse Michelle our night nurse!